It is upon us.
The insurmountable pressure to be happy about everything, normal won’t do, it has to be absolute unadulterated enthusiasm about all things ‘Christmassy’ and that can range from who does the best mince pies to this year’s John Lewis ad. When that first advent calendar door opens… BOOM. You better have a smile on your face for the next 25 days, attend everything your invited to, wear a Christmas jumper to work, join in Secret Santa, embarrass yourself at the Christmas party, OR ELSE!
Let the Festive Fakery begin….
‘And just as the Phoenix rose from the ashes, she too will rise. Returning from the flames, clothed in nothing but her strength, more beautiful than ever before’
– Shannen Heartzs
It has just been Mental Health Awareness week and I have seen lately a lot of discussion flying around particularly on Twitter to do with mental toughness and mental resilience, largely fuelled by Piers Morgan and his incessant need to self promote by being deliberately controversial about things he doesn’t really care about. Sometimes I agree with him, sometimes I don’t, on this current issue, I do see where he is coming from in suggesting that mental resilience should be taught in schools, and I do believe teaching any positive life skill to children can only be a good thing, however it could also reinforce the stereotype that if you are struggling with mental illness then that means you must be weak, that you must be a little bit less than, and as we all know, or should do, that is simply not the case.Read More »
Alone in the ring.
This is how it feels a lot of the time when you are battling mental illness, alone and constantly fighting. Constantly fighting, but no one has come to watch, they probably haven’t even noticed you are fighting. Lets face it you may not have even told anyone the fight was on!, but you have to get up each day and do it anyway.
Every day you wake up wondering if tomorrow will be the day you give up. The next punch that knocks you off your feet, will you have enough in the tank to get you back up again?, or will that be the day you just stay down. Defeated by the demons in your own head.
It is exhausting, It is suffocating. It is debilitating, and then someone says to you “Just go and do some excercise…it will make you feel better” and as much as it makes you want to swing a right hook in their direction for showing their obvious ignorance to the pain you are in, and as annoyingly irritating it may be to hear, they are right. It absolutely will.Read More »
I know I have been off the grid for a while. I did start a blog post in December about Christmas but then Christmas kicked in and kicked that to the kerb!. I dislike Christmas intensely and have done for a long time, so I really worked myself up this time around, knowing I was going to have to get through it whilst also managing this illness, therefore work twice as hard at pretending to be twice as happy than I actually was about everything, because that it what Christmas is right? as I like to call it , A Holly Jolly Headfuck!. So needless to say I am glad it’s all over.Read More »
This week something happened, something that should have happened months ago but I was too stubborn to admit, to proud to give into. I walked into a GPs surgery and asked for help.Read More »
A friend of mine recently asked me how life is going. I said to him, imagine you are the shy kid at school and you are being forced to perform the lead role in the school play every day, and no one has given you the script. It’s that!.Read More »